Shocking news makes me crawl into a cave and hibernate. I have the initial reaction where I tell those closest to me, only the people I love, and then I get mad and completely shut down. I avoid phone calls and people in general.
I spent yesterday morning in a little coffee shop trying to send out resumes. After ten resumes sent, I became frustrated. There were two dudes sitting next to me, trying to write a screen play. They debated this one scene for over an hour. Their voices growing louder. I wanted to reach over the table and hit them, just beat the crap out of them. I just wanted to take out all this pent up emotion and punch them in their junk. I wanted to take my coffee and pour it over their little trivial movie about something presumably stupid.
So, before I made a mess out of the rest of my day, I walked home. I did what my body told me to do. I went to sleep. I knew the next day I would awake with a clearer head and less, "I hate the world" emotions. I'm not the victim here.
I woke up this morning at my usual work wake up time, around 7. I had a very zen moment. This is life. This is how it goes. It's the ups and downs that you can't avoid. This is my story. So often, one bad thing often leads to something better. Sometimes something really bad has to happen for something really good to happen. The things in my life that I never thought I would recover from brought even better things in. That gives me an unexpected sense of relief.
I have an apartment to call my own. I have friends who I positively adore, friends to die for. I have this guy who makes me laugh and who I think is absolutely incredible. I have three besties who are amazing. I have a fantastic Mom. I live in Chicago. I live in Chicago. I live in Chicago.
I have too much happiness in my life right now to feel hopeless. I hope karma gets me back.
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